Dear Healthy Perfect Miracle Girl,

 

       Thats right! Your last ultrasound showed that everything they could see was PERFECT. The hygroma has completely gone and has only left a tiny little bump where it once was. The doctor said she wouldn’t even have noticed the bump if she wasn’t looking for something and said that you looked just like a normal 18 week baby. We are elated. I was a nervous wreck for a few days before your ultrasound. I was so terrified that the hygroma was still going to be there, and be bigger. I was shaking as they turned on the ultrasound machine. You popped up just as cute as always, but this time you were huge, 9 ounces huge to be exact. I can’t believe how much you have grown in just four weeks. We asked the ultrasound technician a hundred questions and with everything we asked she would say, “yes that looks normal”, “yes that looks great”, “yes that looks fine”. As the ultrasound went on we became more and more hopeful that we might just be looking at a healthy miracle child. We met with your neonatologist and she said that is exactly what we were looking at- a perfectly healthy miracle baby. There is still a chance that the underlying cause of the hygroma was a heart issue, so we will still meet with the fetal cardiologists at Primary’s, but they were able to rule out alot of the most major heart issues. We cried and high fived and stared for hours at all your ultrasound photos from the beginning of your journey until now. You are a miracle. You are our miracle. We are going to get to meet you and raise you and try not to ruin you. I feel like a boulder has been lifted off my chest. I don’t have to sit and wonder if every kick is going to be your last, if you are ever going to wear those clothes in your closet, if your dad is ever going to get a chance to spoil you rotten and call us “his girls.” I am so grateful that we experienced this trial. We have learned from it and grown in ways that we never could have any other way. We have been touched by the love of people around us, and have felt the undeniable love that Heavenly Father has for us. We have also grown crazy attached to you little girl. Thanks for being our miracle. Love, mom.

Dear Baby

          Saturday started out to be the worst of days. Your dad had to study all day, and I couldn’t keep anything down to save my life. At 1:00 I finally decided to take a Phenergen. This is a nasty little drug that is supposed to take away nausea, but all it really does is knock me out cold for a couple hours. But, for those blissful couple of hours I am nausea free. Then, I have to wake up… I always feel stoned and awful when I wake up, and basically sit there like a zombie until its time to go to bed again. I woke up at 10:00 p.m. and decided to waste my stoned hours watching Cast Away. Your dad took a break from studying to come watch the end where Tom Hanks gets saved. We were just laying there cuddling on the couch, then all the sudden… Boom. You kicked. It was your first undeniable baby kick. I sat straight up and told your dad and we both started freaking out with excitement. It was seriously the greatest.. stoned and all it was awesome. Even though I told your dad he probably couldn’t feel it yet he finished the movie out with his hand on our stomach waiting for a cute little kick. You didn’t kick again until the next morning. Thank you so much little girl for turning our super lame Saturday into a good one, and thanks for waiting to give your first good kickaroo until I was cuddled up with your dad. It couldn’t have been cooler. You rock. Love, mom.     

O Christmas Tree

     The second best day in December (Christmas eve being the best day) is the day we decorate the tree. We turn the lights down low and put the tree up while slow dancing around to our Christmas mix on itunes. It’s the most perfect night. I have loved it ever since I was little when we would decorate at home with the Forgotten Carols playing in the background.

       We started collecting Christmas ornaments from places we’d been together when we first got married. I love hanging them up and remembering each trip and the circumstance that we bought the ornament under. Our road trip this summer added a handful of ornaments from our favorite places we stopped. We could have filled the tree just with that trip, but just stuck to our favorite places. I love the first one we got on our cruise in 2007 the most, and Todd loves the Boston one. However, I made a tree skirt this year, and now that might just almost be my favorite part of the tree. It’s strange and kind of sad knowing that it’s Todd and I’s last Christmas just the two of us. But, we are looking forward to having little babe joining in the festivities with us next year (fingers crossed).

The girls

Dear baby,

      I hope one day you get to act 10 years old with your best friends during a holiday break. I hope you laugh until you cry and talk about nothing and everything. Love, mom.